Whether You Fall
by chavalah
Summary: Phoebe has just finished her first year of college with ease, but still bears a broken heart that refuses to heal. Will the summer after her Freshman year prove to find new beginnings or will the person who left her so broken hearted return?


Author's Note: This would be my first piece on Glad I finally got the guts to participate rather than merely read (even if it is my favorite thing to do. Of course, I do not own Magic School Bus, Scholastic does. I can only wish.

If anyone would be interested in beta-ing these chapters before the go up, please let me know. Otherwise, please read and review!

Whether You Fall

by Chavalah

Chapter One-Sad Songs and Waltzes

Phoebe stared at Walkerville Elementary, its bricks looking dingy in the afternoon light. The building had been abandoned three years ago, during her junior year of high school. Now it was just another abandoned haunt, a victim of the American obsession with upgrading. The new Walkerville Elementary stood closer to the newer housing developments. Its state of the art design couldn't be beat by any other elementary school in the county. But in Phoebe's heart she knew no other school could rival the old Walkerville Elementary. She'd even caught herself referring to it as 'her old school.'

She hadn't intended to end up here, but her emotions were in a jumbled sort of state, leaving her sub-conscience in complete control. And she knew the kind of bond she had with the old building, reminiscing on her time meeting the seven people who would still remain the closet of her friends. One of these, specifically, who she imagined was jet-setting somewhere in Europe with countless new acquaintances all as luscious and enticing as he'd turned out to be. And where was Phoebe Terese? On the old jungle gym, wishing she could have been with him.

She'd remembered when Arnold had first told her he was going to take a gap year before college. It had shocked all of their friends. It would have made much more sense had it been Dorothy Ann, seeking new knowledge in some ancient library in Britain, just because she could. Or Tim, taking the art tour, through the ancient works in Italy, to decrepit churches in Spain, ending with the chaotic culture of France. Even Carlos, living out his dream of an adventure rivaling EuroTrip. But not Arnold. Shy, beautiful Arnold who was supposed to go to the state college with the rest of them, study rocks, and spending the rest of his days constructing the histories of things without names. Things buried in the earth.

But it was Arnold. And Phoebe had been completely shocked. She'd remembered her excitement at the time, the possibility that he might want her to come. They had been lying on the slide, very near where she was now, watching the stars try to make their way through the hazy sky. "You know, I have the trust fund that the Terese departed left for me, to be used for my 'educational needs'. Perhaps if I gave my parents a well devised plan of educational proportion they might agree to my taking an expedition to europe too! And we could travel together, and..."

He had turned and stopped her, placing a hand on her skinny arm. "Phoebe..."

She ignored him. "I've always wanted to go to Austria, thats where my Oma and Opa Terese were from..."

"Phoebe," he said, with a sigh. "I wasn't going to ask you to come. In fact, that's partly why I told you first."

She had laughed then, in a burst. "But Arnold, we've been together since Freshman year. We've never spent more than a week apart! Even you said it was the worst week of your life."

Arnold picked up one her hands. "That was then, Pheebs. This is now. I'm not sure where I'm going in life, but I don't think it's with you."

Phoebe snatched her hand away. His admission had come without any warning. Just the week before they had graduated and spent the night out by the lake with the rest of the gang. He'd even told her that he thought he could marry her. Now he didn't want to be with her?

"So you don't love me anymore?" She said bitterly.

"I do! Just, I'm not in love with you anymore."

Phoebe closed herself up, pulling her long legs into her chest. She sat like that for what seemed like hours, ignoring Arnold's continued plea's of "I'm sorry". His pleas hung in the air like fireflies, floating around her head, but she merely waved them away and let the hot, silent tears roll down her cheeks. He brushed one of these away before he finally got up and walked to his car, leaving her and the great expanse of endless sky.

The next day he'd told his friends that he was going abroad. He left it to her to break the news of their ended relationship, information she told Keesha that morning and asked her to quietly pass around. The girls had spent the weekend after 'celebrating' Phoebe's new found freedom, ignoring the extended time she spent in the bathroom and the red splotches on her face that followed. By the time Arnold departed at the end of the summer, she was speaking to him, but only among friends and only about things related to the group. In her heart, she still thought he was her world. But she couldn't get past the ache, knowing that her world didn't even want her in it.

It had now been a year since he left. His last email had said he intended to spend another six months away, charting waters in the Mediterranean. Every email he sent the group had some fantastic story. None, to Phoebe's relief, every mentioned a girl seriously.

She and the others had finished their first year at the university, all exceeding even their own expectations. Not to say that they didn't have "copious amounts of debauchery" as Wanda would put to show off her new vocabulary. But they managed to find enough time to study to hold up their own exceptional standard of grades. Carlos and D.A. had successfully managed their college relationship, one way overdo according to anyone who knew them. Keesha was seeing a fellow from Minnesota who had come for the Architecture program. Every opportunity they had, Carlos and Ralphie attempted to get him to say 'gophers' or 'coca-cola'. Ralphie had shocked everyone when he decided to major in journalism, only to right the world again when he clarified that is was for sports. Thus far, he was dating his coursework and beer pong. Tim was participating in the on-campus art community and anonymously attempted to pursue graffiti-ing. Many were impressed by his vivid work, often detailing what looked like science lessons, bursting in color. His friends caught on quickly to his alter-ego, citing the spray paint in his trunk as more than valid proof. He had been casually seeing Arnold's cousin Janet, a truth that had horrified everyone for a short time. They let it go as long as they only had to see her once a week. Wanda was pursuing a career in dance, one that Mr. and Mrs. Li hardly approved of but none the less agreed to as long as she maintained a good G.P.A. This she did while maintaing status as most desired freshman, a status that never kept her longing for dates.

Phoebe herself was still undecided on a major. She wanted to study animals, but couldn't decide if she'd rather study animal behavior or attend veterinary school. She'd spent her first two semesters taking as many random courses as possible, knowing she would be able to put them towards requirements once she finally did choose. As for dating, she wasn't without possibilities; she just chose to ignore them. Arnold's rejection of her stung long after, and she found it very difficult to overcome her newly developed phobia of love. But now that it was summer, she could put the stress of majors and the sorrow of loss behind her. She merely wanted to relax and renew, spending time with her six friends (and their occasional tag alongs...er, lovers) running the old haunts of Walkerville.

All this floated through her mind as she sat on the jungle gym, not seeing the person studying the school from the long abandoned garden.


End file.
